Hercules is born to Zeus and Hera on Mount Olympus but because of a prophecy, the evil ruler of the underworld Hades, arranges his kidnapping. And while Hades’ minions manage to turn him into a human, they don’t kill him. Instead he’s raised by a couple old farmers (sound familiar?) until he’s old enough to seek out Zeus and set out on the path to becoming a hero worthy of the gods. But at every turn Hades tries to stop him so he can but his own plan of world domination into motion.
On the one hand I can understand why this movie chose to create it’s own story rather than adapt one of the Greek myths surrounding Heracles -yeah this movie about the Greek hero refers to him by his Roman name. Few of those are suitable for a Disney crowd, but at the same time they’re so much more interesting. This film could have had a story to rival those though, but it chose to go for something more derivative. The first half is just a mixture of Superman and Rocky, with Hercules having almost the exact same origin story as Clark Kent and then being the underdog as he trains with a crusty short guy. It’s incredibly lazy and boring given what could be done with this figure. There’s plenty of references to the classics which shows the filmmakers had at least a passing interest in Greek mythology, but a number of them are just used for lame jokes and often they just blend in with the modern references. Oh yeah, though this movie may be set in ancient Greece it really tries hard to appeal to the youth demographic with a whole host of modern references and mannerisms. The idea behind this is clearly to do what Aladdin did, but in that film it worked because for the most part the references were to figures rather than culture and trends, and Robin Williams integrated them in an entertaining way that didn’t feel out of place. In Hercules it’s bad enough we have an Ancient Greek film with character names like Meg and Phil, but Hades for example uses a number of football phrases during Hercules’ fight with the Hydra. If it had just been one that’d be fine and I’d chalk it up to improv, but clearly someone wanted these references hammered in. Hercules is stormed by very current fangirl stereotypes, and the conversation amongst the citizens of Thebes feels like an SNL sketch. One or two modern jokes work (“over 50000000001 served” is pretty clever) but they’re rare exceptions. And there’s shameless commercialism in it too. On the surface it may seem like all the Hercules products are just a satire of heavy merchandising, but many of them actually existed! Hell I got that Hercules brand cup from a McDonalds happy meal! It’s just an excuse to advertise within their own film! And this all effects the remainder of the movie’s plot which feels like a check-list of necessities or clichés: the hero breaks up with his mentor due to a misunderstanding only for them to reconcile, he’s weakened because of a trick, he learns love is the most important thing, etc. It’s all incredibly basic which Greek mythology shouldn’t be! Apart from some interesting monster designs, the climax is very dull and all this might be worth it for a good message. But the message is your half-assed “strength of the heart is more important than strength of the body” bullshit.
In fact the whole reason Hercules does any of this is to become a god again and not only is Zeus a dick for judging him as a “hero”, but Hercules doesn’t really have good motivations. The role of a “hero” is a vague one. There’s references to Odysseus and Achilles, but they were generals in the Trojan War. Hercules just wants to save the day, again like Superman. Though I actually believe Superman’s obligation to humanity much more than Hercules, who’s doing it just to become a god. And he wants to be a god because he “doesn’t belong” (accidents aside, surely some would respect his strength -he can’t be a total outcast), yet he doesn’t show much more investment in that world either. You don’t believe he wants to do good by others, and when you think about it, he’s pretty selfish. Zeus as I mentioned is a bit of a dick but not quite as much as in actual Greek mythology. He’s overly jovial and exuberant but you never feel his power, apart from the fact he’s voiced by Rip Torn. Danny DeVito voices Phil the satyr and is basically what you’d expect from DeVito -who actually gets a couple laughs. The main problem is of course he doesn’t fit in this movie. As the comic relief in another Disney movie perhaps, but not Hercules where he sticks out like a sore thumb. The character of Megara I’m torn on a little. She’s voiced by Susan Egan, who was great as the original Belle on Broadway (she was also in a couple Miyazaki dubs and voices Rose on Steven Universe) and I love her sarcastic attitude. But she’s given a lot of cringe-worthy lines and becomes way too dependent on Hercules by the end. Also design-wise she’s pretty awful. Usually I don’t agree with the complaints that Disney princesses encourage negative body images (if they do, the princes are just as guilty), but Meg is almost pencil-thin! There are some other poor casting choices like comedians Bobcat Goldthwaite and Matt Frewer completely wasted as henchmen Pain and Panic; and others that are just weird or pointless like Wayne Knight, Hal Holbrook, Keith David, and freaking Charlton Heston as the narrator -what?!! (Also Paul Shaffer as Hermes, really?) The best part of the movie is easily James Woods as Hades! Woods plays Hades as a smarmy producer/insurance salesman type who’s constantly making deals. Like Robin Williams before him, Woods ad-libs a lot of his lines and you can tell as they’re the ones that get the most laughs. Some that are just going for references fail (I can’t imagine Woods came up with that specific Siskel & Ebert line) but many of them work and make for a very entertaining villain and the only character who’s really enjoyable at all. His design is pretty good too. But even Hades suffers from stereotypes. The Underworld is equated with Hell and thus Hades with the devil which anyone with any basic knowledge of Greek mythology knows is not right. And because he’s just the devil, his ambitions are too simplified. If it weren’t for the unique personality Woods gave him, he’d be as bland as a Marvel villain.
But as I noted, Hercules is a movie that’s easy to enjoy as a kid. I know I did. At the time the references felt smart, the setting kinda big, and the one-liners we could laugh at. It seemed cool which is exactly what the studio heads wanted. There was also the animation that stood out in its distinct character design and colour scheme on the gods. I get the intent behind it is to replicate the style of art from the period, but now I actually find it stale and unappealing, especially following on the heels of The Hunchback of Notre Dame’s visual grandness. It’s way too Saturday morning cartoon-y in a number of scenes. And the Hydra looks horrendous! Even back then, I’d seen Toy Story so I knew how good CG animation could look and this is just one of the worst CG creations in a traditionally animated film I’ve ever seen! The songs for this film were written by Alan Menken on one of his off days. I still don’t get what the hell was up with those Muses singing songs in an R&B/gospel music style. How does that fit with Ancient Greece?! DeVito has a song “One Last Hope” that’s just a training montage. Musically it’s okay but the lyrics are awful. The main song “Go the Distance” seems to have been written for its Michael Bolton cover rather than the film itself. It’s not terrible just a little too generic. And I hate how it just resurfaces after Hercules’ meeting with Zeus as if that whole major character discovery was just a pause in the song. The one song I actually kinda like is “I Won’t Say (I’m in Love)” and that may just be because I love Egan’s voice. The muses certainly don’t add anything to it.
Maybe I’m being a little too hard on Hercules, but I just feel that Disney taking on Greek mythology should result in something as epic as The Lion King. Can you imagine if they did the Odyssey or Jason and the Argonauts or Theseus? But instead Disney churns out a really formulaic story that’s uninteresting, too commercial, and again is trying unsuccessfully to speak to modern sensibilities. I don’t think kids today will get out of it what the last generation did when we were their age, though I will say it may be worth one viewing purely for Woods as Hades. But in all honesty, I think you’d be better off watching the Kevin Sorbo series. At least that has Xena.
Next Week: Mulan (1998)
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